'Trinity' gives life to vampire flicks

January 14, 2005


"Blade Trinity" is by leaps and bounds the most different vampire

movie that I have ever seen. By no means the best, but as innovative

and entertaining as a movie of this genre could ever aspire to be.

The typical, boilerplate plot involves legions of ghoulish, or

irresistibly gorgeous, vampires slaking their thirst on hapless

virgins until the hunter tracks them down to impale them. Even the


first two Blade predecessors are guilty of this platitude. This

popcorn thriller is something else though.

The pace of "Blade Trinity" is absolutely staggering. Sequence

after sequence reveals and intrigues more than the last. The gist is

both convoluted with whimsy and sentiment, and straightforward and

dangerously sharp. Blade's only confidant, friend and mentor Whistler

(Kris Kristofferson) meets an untimely demise. A jaded Blade

surrenders to police only to be rescued from certain death by Abigail

Whistler (Jessica Biel) and Hannibal King (Ryan Reynolds). From there

the script gets even crazier.

Danica Talos (Parker Posey), Jarko Grimwood (Triple H) and a

dangerous cadre manage to resurrect Blade's arch nemesis Dracula.

Their clandestine mission to use Dracula to assassinate Blade and

harvest the blood of humanity can only be prevented by Blade and his

new motley crew.

The film uses fascinating modern technology, not excluding viral

weaponry. The flick is also imbued with enough comic relief to fill

the massive holes in the sub par dialogue. I mean, who can't laugh

when Dracula calls Bram Stoker's masterpiece a "pathetic fable." My

only grouse with the film is that other than this line Dominic

Purcell absolutely flat-lines as Dracula. He is supposed to be the

most diabolic character in fiction and he really isn't scarier than a


As a whole, the film is hip, funny and a thrill ride.

'Fockers' more of the same, which is good

"Meet the Fockers" is a difficult film to review.

The flick was phenomenal in many aspects. It had outrageously

funny slapstick, pithy repartee, sardonic jesting and countless play

on words with the infamous surname, Focker. It was its exceptional

predecessor that made the appellation Focker a household name, and

left audiences slavering for more.

The only problem is that more is exactly what they got, just

amplified. It was bigger, more flamboyant, sordid but primarily just

more of the same.

Kudos for signing the ensemble cast of Robert De Niro, Ben

Stiller, Dustin Hoffman, Barbra Streisand, Blythe Danner and Teri

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